


Born to Stand Out

by panther



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Hogwarts Sixth Year, Second War with Voldemort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-22
Updated: 2011-12-22
Packaged: 2017-10-27 17:37:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/298332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/panther/pseuds/panther
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pansy starts to get cold feet over her secret relationship with Seamus and he must try to break through her fears and help her believe she can stand out from the crowd for what she really wants.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Born to Stand Out

**Author's Note:**

> for interhouse_fest on lj for the prompt 'born to stand out' and this pairing :) was really fun to write!

Seamus shifts uneasily from foot to foot while waiting for her to appear, craning his neck to peer around the bookshelf, while turning over their last meeting in his mind. Pansy had been distant and quiet, lacking her usual bite in her responses to his comments, and Seamus had started to worry. He was fully aware that what they were doing was strange and in some ways casual but all the same he had felt closer to her over the past couple of months, as she pulled further away from Malfoy’s influence, and didn’t want to be dumped without warning. It made him feel uneasy to be waiting for her behind a tall bookcase at the back of the library considering that was the very place where their _relationship_ began. Just before the Christmas holidays they had stumbled upon one another and began bickering as usual with Seamus throwing teasing jibes with Pansy returning them with a little more sting before they had somehow ended up making out against the shelves and sending more than one book crashing to the floor. The holidays had given them both time to think and somehow they had both decided that a little fun wouldn’t kill either of them. It was dark times and they had to live a little.

Feelings were not meant to come into it. Conversation wasn’t meant to be more than accusations and insults between getting dressed and leaving whichever side room they had snuck into but somewhere along the line that went out the window by February and by the time May comes around Seamus has developed genuine and deep feelings for the snarky Slytherin that, frankly, terrify the Irishman. That has a lot to do with his nerves as he waits and waits and _waits_ for Pansy to appear.

His mind starts creating various chains of events that might have led to her getting hurt in some way or worse discovered by her house mates. Seamus has a fear of his own housemates noticing where he sneaks off to or following him when he leaves the tower, often leading to him taking longer routes to get to places to throw off any would be followers, but at least he is pretty sure that all they would do is call him every name under the sun and Pansy even worse. He isn’t so confident in the reactions of Slytherin house. It might be a prejudice but it is still something that puts him on edge.

“Don’t burst a blood vessel, Finnigan,” Pansy says softly as she wraps her arms around him from behind, “Don’t want you doing yourself any damage before the fun part now do we?”

“In case you hadn’t noticed,” Seamus drawls, while covering her hands with his own across his stomach, “We’re in a library.”

Pansy shifts until she can look up at him while still clinging on from behind and raises an eyebrow, “You have a point in there somewhere? We’ve done worse,” she teases, knowing glint in her eye that makes Seamus feel a little hot under the collar.

“Don’t I know it. Where were you? You’re late.”

“You’re not my keeper,” Pansy states firmly while pulling him backwards and pushing him into a chair in the corner before sitting down on his lap, legs on either side of his body, making her skirt bunch up.

Seamus blinks up at her, resting his hands on her creamy thighs as she smirks down at him, “I know that. I was worried.”

“Worried?”

“That you’d been found out,” Seamus replies while getting his wand out and throwing up some privacy charms.

“I can take care of myself,” Pansy responds haughtily, “If you must know, I was doing some thinking. I asked you to meet me here because we need to talk.”

 _We need to talk._ Never good words to hear, Seamus thinks with a grimace.

“I like my time with you,” Pansy says quietly, “But realistically, I’m not sure it can go on.”

Seamus watches her dumbly, waiting for her to say something more even though he knows she has always been blunt, something that makes sense and justifies it but gets nothing, “Excuse me? You’re sitting in my lap and you tell me this?! _Why_? We were having a good time, what changed Pansy?”

Her gaze moves to the shelf to their right, the one boxing them in and away from the outside world, creating what should be a little corner to study in and instead creating a space she can’t escape from. Pansy can feel the way Seamus’ fingers are digging into her hips as he waits on her saying something, anything, anger clear in his usually warm eyes.

“This isn’t _right_ , Seamus! We’re too different! What are we even doing? We’ve spent years snapping at each other, being rivals, I’ve been a first class bitch!,” she hisses.

“That never mattered before,” Seamus states adamantly, taking in the way Pansy seems more on edge than usual. If she was just dumping him, she would be colder about it, he is sure. Despite their serious tone, he can feel the heat coming from between her legs with her on his lap and so lifts her up and places her on the desk before he rises to his feet, putting some space between them as he tries to gather his thoughts. Someone had got to her, something had been said to make her panic, Seamus was sure of it.

“Well it matters now,” Pansy mutters, not even able to look at him while she says it and he sighs and runs a hand through his hair, resisting the urge to lash out and kick the bookcase beside him.

“What happened?,” he asks and when she frowns and opens her mouth to speak he cuts her off abruptly, “Pansy, don’t fuck with me ok? _What happened?_ ”

For a few long moments she just stares at him, a number of emotions flickering through her eyes before she breaks his gaze and stares at the floor, kicking her feet slightly under the desk like a younger schoolgirl, making her seem vulnerable and afraid. It says more than any words she had spoken since she wrapped herself around Seamus five minutes before and he takes a step towards her to listen to what she has to say,

“It isn’t safe,” she mumbles quietly.

“Why not? Has someone threatened you?” Seamus asks, feeling a flash of anger in his bones because who had any right to threaten her? This world they lived in just seemed to be about one group telling another what to do with terrible consequences for those that refused and that isn’t the wonderful world his mother promised was waiting for him when he got his letter.

Her back straightens and she scowls at him, “They don’t have to! There is a fucking war going on Seamus! This is dangerous, this, _this right here_ could get me killed; don’t you understand that?”

Pink splotches cover her cheeks and Seamus can’t help but take a moment to look her over because it seems so different from her normal composed self, showing that her fears are actually very real and not just an overreaction or jerk reaction on her part.

“Isn’t that all the more reason to do what we want to do, _because_ we’re at war and might not make it?” Seamus asks quietly.

“I’m a Slytherin! I need to look out for myself and try to survive this!” Pansy shrieks at him, hands waving in the air before she is pulling at her hair and breathing deeply as Seamus explodes at her.

“Merlin stop using that as an excuse! You really think that will matter when we leave these walls? Fuck no! All the ideas of what the houses are total bullshit and if you open your eyes you will see that! Hermione should be in Ravenclaw, there are Aurors that were in Hufflepuff, and Slytherins that became Healers and that is all about caring for _others_ before yourself!,” Seamus fumes, pacing and almost trembling in irritation, “Don’t let your fear stop you.”

“Don’t let your false confidence stop _you_ from seeing what needs to be done. We need to make it through this!” Pansy insists but Seamus just shakes his head, “Merlin you stupid Gryffindor! You’re all as stupid as each other! Don’t you have any sense of self-preservation?!”

Seamus ignores the jibes and just raises an eyebrow at her, “You care about a Gryffindor, a half-blood Gryffindor, and I think that is what you’re afraid of. You don’t want someone to find out.”

Guiltily, she looks at the floor and Seamus sighs, “Seamus I...you know how I’ve been in school over the past years. You and I both know that Snape is dangerous and he is my head of house! I just think that maybe...maybe even just a break until we’re safe!”

Seamus again paces their small corner before walking over and grabbing Pansy by the shoulder, shaking her and talking loudly in her face, glad for the silencing charms, “You said it yourself! We’re at war! There might not be a later! Look, I really care about you! You care about me or you wouldn’t have let this go on this far! Why are you trying so hard to fight it when you were born to stand out?"

“I can’t!”

“You can”, Seamus barks, “You’re strong enough to be the one that stands up and says she won’t let stupid fucking house prejudices stop her doing what she _wants_ instead of what she has been told to do by people that don’t give a damn about her.”

Wide eyes blink up at him and when a tear forms in her eye Seamus wipes it away, “We’re at war. We might not make it. I don’t want to get blown away by some Death Eater scumbag and realise I spent my last months without the person I wanted to be with. So what if your parents believe in the pureblood stuff, so what if some of your classmates are stupid enough to follow the Dark Lord, so _what_. You were born to live your life, not theirs. If you want to end things with me, then fine, but I’d rather it was because of something I’d done rather than something someone else said.”

Pressing a kiss to her forehead, he hears her gasp and then backs away from her, waving a hand in front of himself to signify that he has said his piece. Seamus Finnigan has fought for Pansy Parkinson. It makes him smile to realise how ridiculous that would have sounded even a year ago. Pansy lowers her head and presses her fingers to the creases in her skirt as she thinks for a few minutes while he watches her carefully before jumping off the desk, walking towards Seamus and kissing him soundly on the lips, his arms automatically coming up around her.

“Potter taught you how to fight didn’t he?” she murmurs against his lips.

“Yeah?”

“Tomorrow night you start teaching me. I think I’m going to need it if I’m going to be hanging around with a bunch of moronic Gryffindors. Cause there isn’t any way I will be welcome in the dungeons when this comes out.”

Laughing, Seamus picks her up and spins her around, “Pansy Parkinson, I will teach you everything I know.”


End file.
